As women, we often find it difficult to rest—or even feel that we deserve rest. Western society has conditioned us to believe that success means constant ’doing’ and activity. The busier we are, the more we’re seen as “achieving,” and with this achievement, we are led to believe that happiness and contentment will be our reward.
So why then, are so many of us feeling burnt out, depleted, and overwhelmed?
We’ve been told that we can and should “have it all.”
We’re expected to nurture, lead, create, all whilst juggling multiple roles—mother, friend, daughter, partner, employee or employer—and amongst that, still find time for self-care. Even in the little free time we may perhaps find, we’re encouraged to hit the gym and become our strongest, 'best' selves, because “having it all” seems to be the ultimate goal.
But let’s be honest. For most of us, this relentless drive comes at a very high cost.
Instead of helping us thrive, the societal expectation to “do it all &. have it all” is leaving us exhausted, depleted, and starved of the one thing we truly need—rest.
We’re denying ourselves one of the most powerful and free elixirs for a full, vibrant life:the ability to rest.
Rest is Not a Luxury—It’s Essential
Rest has increasingly been seen as a luxury, something we feel we need to earn after ticking off every item on our to-do list. But when we wait until we’re utterly exhausted, rest no longer becomes restorative—it becomes a last resort. We’re left limping toward it, sometimes only after illness brings us to an abrupt holt.
In accepting the myth that we must “earn” rest, we deny ourselves the very thing that can bring us back to life.
So, how can we begin to change this narrative?
Instead of waiting until we’ve done it all, why not prioritise rest as we would any other daily necessity, like brushing our teeth or showering?
Rest is not just a pause from physical activity; it’s an opportunity to recharge mentally, emotionally, creatively, socially, and spiritually. In fact, there are seven types of rest, each offering its own unique benefits.
The Seven Types of Rest
1. Physical Rest
Physical rest goes beyond sleep; it includes any activity that relaxes your body and helps it recover. Consider:
• Restorative yoga
• Gentle stretching
• Taking naps
• Yoga nidra
• A massage
• Short, mindful breaks
• Going for a leisurely walk
2. Mental Rest
Mental rest involves giving your brain a break from constant stimulation. This helps restore focus and clarity. Try:
• Turning off your phone, especially in the evening
• Limiting social media use
• Meditation or mindfulness practices
3. Emotional Rest
Emotional rest allows you to step back from emotional demands. While it can feel difficult, especially if guilt arises, it’s essential for processing feelings. Examples include:
• Spending time alone
• Journaling
• Talking to a trusted friend
• Practicing self-care
• Engaging in creative hobbies like painting or gardening
4. Sensory Rest
In a world filled with sensory overload, taking breaks from screens, noise, and bright lights is crucial. Sensory rest might look like:
• Turning off the TV and radio
• Closing your eyes, perhaps with an eye mask
• Spending time in a quiet space
• Listening to calming music
• Practicing yoga nidra or guided relaxation
5. Creative Rest
Creative rest rejuvenates your ability to think freely and generate ideas. It’s essential for staying inspired. To foster creative rest, try:
• Taking a break from work
• Pursuing a hobby like drawing, knitting, or cooking
• Visiting places that spark creativity, such as museums or nature
6. Social Rest
Social rest helps you step away from draining interactions. While some people energize us, others deplete us. Social rest might involve:
• Saying no to certain social engagements
• Spending time with positive, supportive people
• Finding moments of solitude
• Enjoying time alone without obligation
7. Spiritual Rest
Spiritual rest involves connecting to something greater than yourself. It can bring a sense of purpose and grounding. Examples include:
• Meditation or prayer
• Spending time in nature
• Volunteering for a cause you care about
• Engaging in spiritual practices that resonate with you
To read more about the different types of rest, read
Changing the Narrative Around Rest
I understand that the issue of rest is complex. It’s influenced by generations of societal expectations, self-worth, and deeply ingrained beliefs about productivity. The irony is that the more we deny ourselves rest, the higher our levels of stress and anxiety become. This, in turn, affects the quality of our sleep and overall health. And let’s not forget the additional challenge of hormonal shifts during menopause that can make rest even more elusive—but that’s a topic for another post.
Ultimately, if we want to change how we view rest, that change has to start with us. No one else can give you permission to rest—it’s something you must claim for yourself.
Small Steps Toward Rest
Begin by creating boundaries around your time. Say no to social engagements that don’t bring you joy. Turn down the lights, switch off the TV, and allow yourself moments of daydreaming. Take a bath in the middle of the day, read a book, or simply breathe deeply for five minutes. These small openings for rest can have a profound impact on your physical, mental, and energetic health.
There are many ways to seek rest, and it requires nothing more than the willingness to change the narrative and explore the possibility that moments of ‘non-productivity’ could be the most powerful antidote to modern-day despondency.
Perhaps you'd like to begin here, and take this as your que to take a moment to pause and take a pocket of rest for yourself with this restorative pose https://www.rachaelmooreyoga.com/post/day-11
alongside this playlist...https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1rDLV8Eu0csNvPmDItV1Kz?si=9000bb0a678b4615
Never feel that rest needs to be earned—rather, recognise and remember that it’s a powerful remedy for the exhaustion and burnout many of us experience today.
You my love are more than worthy of taking pockets of rest daily.
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